My Health IV

Of course I don't have illusions that my cancer will go away, but it gives me hope that I might end up peacefully and without pain by falling asleep, awakening in an other world. With this kind of cancer I was mortally afraid to die by suffocation. Now I understand the use of water boarding to get information out tortured prisoners, because this fear is so terrifying that, at least I would do anything to avoid it.
But to get back to the brighter side, it is great to enjoy life without some constant or returning pain.

It is interesting how one can get used to many things. After less than a year I very seldom crave for real food or drinks, and these cravings diminish with time. We seem to have a built in mechanism, which adjusts our desires to our capabilities. Of course, some self discipline helps too. I'm sure people who stopped smoking could tell you more about this.

Martha is coming to visit me on the 9th of November. Lisa has problems with getting her passport. It is hard to believe that the passport office is so indifferent to human problems that they can not speed this up. But with this hysterical war against terrorism, everything is possible, I am sure that their upcoming visit has something to do with my feeling better,